A Quick Look at Look at Me by Jennifer Egan

 Jennifer Egan's Look At Me is so rich with meaning and social commentary that I don’t know where to begin in expressing how I feel about it. I can say that it left me feeling miserable after reading it. I literally finished the final line, shut the book, and crawled into bed for an impromptu nap. It was as if the weight and magnitude of the book’s message pressed me down and I had no choice but to try and sleep away the uneasy feeling that had settled over me.

This book was written before the advent of MySpace, Facebook, and YouTube but it eerily predicts all of these social networking mediums. The fictional “PersonalSpace ™” website that Charlotte joins turns people into “shopping malls” and commodifies every aspect of identity including hopes, dreams, and aspirations. Look At Me could be read as a cautionary tale in that sense. Did I feel depressed after reading it because the image obsessed culture that the novel warns against has already come to pass? No, it isn’t that. I think it’s more that this type of society has sprung up around us and well - nobody fucking cares.

I think on some level we know that our image and profit obsessed culture is terrible but yet we all want our slice of this shitty pie. We are dying to sell out. We post photos, videos, blog posts, 40 character bites of commentary, in the hope that someone will Look At Us, Notice Us, and if we’re lucky, Sponsor Us - or maybe that’s just me? Charlotte and her little sister fantasized as girls that their life was a movie that people were watching. Now little girls actually aspire to have their lives turned into a reality show (and if they become teen moms they just might get their wish).

The characters of Z and Moose and their respective journeys seem to confirm what I have feared for a long time: resistance is futile and leads to personal ruin rather than structural change. If you swallow the red pill and step outside the Matrix you are likely to find yourself terrified and alone.  Simply recognizing what Z terms “the conspiracy” can be devastating. It’s easier, perhaps imperative, that you just chill out and eat a fucking burger or take your wife to Hawaii.

Choose wisely ...

Maybe I’ve wandered too far into the realm of cultural criticism. Let’s focus on some more practical matters such as Egan’s preternatural ability to construct powerful metaphors and illustrate the inner anxieties of a character.  Her use of figurative language does not preclude the use of miraculous single word descriptors either. If her diction is anything to go by, Egan has an expansive vocabulary and knows what to do with it. She has a relationship with the English language that I can’t help but envy. If you’re an aspiring writer get your hands on one of Egan’s books immediately.  

Also, much of the novel takes place in my hometown of Rockford, IL. The primary protagonist of the novel was born and raised in Rockford and despised everything about it. Reading her scornful descriptions of Rockford was uncanny and at times made me uncomfortable, for I too grew up fantasizing about “getting out” of Rockford as if it were some sort of prison. In some ways reading this book made me ashamed of my shame and made me feel unusually protective of my hometown. 

All in all I can’t say that I enjoyed reading Look At Me. It was engaging and objectively I realize that it is a brilliant work of fiction; but it was almost too real. It presents a bleak future that feels as imminent as it does irredeemable. For some of you, reading it may amount to taking Morpheus’ red pill and for that reason I recommend it cautiously.